Memories

Yesterday was a low point for me... hopefully the lowest. The combination of pure exhaustion, raging hormones, and breastfeeding troubles nearly did me in. However, through the grogginess and the tears, I was still amazed by how precious my son is and how I grow more and more in love with him with each passing moment.

Because I know that in time these first few weeks will be a blur, I wanted to take note of a few things that I don't ever want to forget...

• The amazing sense of accomplishment that I felt when I gave birth to my son.
• How tiny he felt in my arms for the first time.
• How all of the nurses made such a fuss over his eyelashes (the first trait that I could claim).
• His tiny little cries... they became much bigger cries all too fast.
• How much hair he has! For months, I wondered what his hair would look like, but I never guessed that he would have this much hair! It's way too cute!
• The look on Blake's face the first time (and every time since) that he laid eyes on his boy. "Enamored" was the word that Blake used to describe the feeling.
• Watching our parents meet their first grandchild.
• How good it feels to hold my baby in my arms.
• His ears. They're still hairy (a Blake trait?), and one of them is squished just like one of mine.
• His fuzzy back.
• How incredibly soft his skin is.
• His smell (when he doesn't have a poopie diaper). I wish I could bottle it!
• All of the funny facial expressions that he makes in his sleep... so many, many expressions. What could he possibly be dreaming about!?!
• His smile. Even though he only smiles with his eyes closed at this point, he is smiling more and more often, and it makes my whole day!
• The fact that everyone says he looks just like Blake. He's such a handsome boy.
• His long, skinny fingers and toes.
• How fast his fingernails grow! They need to be filed at least once a week!
• How amazing my mother was to stay with us for a week and a half. I couldn't have done it without her. And, what they say about appreciating your mother more after you become a mother is totally true.
• How excited we were when his umbilical cord fell off... despite the fact that we have no idea where it went!
• How cute his belly button is.
• How often he gets the hiccups!
  
• How strong he is. He loves to push up when he's laying on your chest and look around!
• His Zoolander face.
• How much I love to kiss those little feet that kicked me for so long!
• How all of his newborn clothes were too big for him.
• How peaceful he is when he's asleep.
• The cowlick on the front of his head which is just like Blake's... eventually it will be a Superman curl.
  
• His skinny, bird legs (another Blake trait).
• All of his extra, wrinkly skin... kind of like a puppy.
• How he loves to sit in the sunshine (Granny taught him that one).
• All of his sweet noises.
• How thrilled Blake and I are to have had a baby together.
• How everything felt surreal until the moment he was born, and then it felt like he had always been here.
• The funny noises that Blake makes every time he doesn't get the diaper on in time and Gus christens the wall and everything else within his range.
• How I could spend hours just staring at him.
  
• How big his eyes get when he is trying to figure out the world around him.
  
• What a natural Blake is with his son. They have a bond that cannot be described in words! Watching them together makes my life.
  
• How good it felt to hold him and to know that he had missed me after Blake and I went on our first post-baby date.
• How I would do anything in the world for this child.
• How very, very much I love him.
• How lucky I am that he is mine.